What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

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TEXT:

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

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But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

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Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

What options are available for obtaining prescribed medicine if you are in therapy, do not have insurance, but need them for functioning well?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Make Nazis afraid again!

What ended your relationship with your best friend?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

According to Amy Schumer, John Cena was actually inside of her during the TrainWreck love scene. I thought that was illegal in Hollywood?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

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At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

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And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

What are the legal obligations of a new homeowner if the previous owner leaves furniture in the house after moving out?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

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Shameless vixen! Trollop!